Sometimes waiting on God can have you feeling like you are stopped at a red light, with a traffic cam, and a cop who knows the light takes 5 hours, 47 min, and 12 sec to change just waiting for you to hit the pedal and go. It can be hard, but in the end you know it will be worth it as your path will be clear, accident free, and ready for you to cruise on down the road.
Habakkuk 1:2 He cries out to the Lord wondering how long he has to wait, and God do nothing. Sometimes it feels like you are all alone and left to fend for yourself. Psalms 130:5-6 Speak of the psalmist’s soul waiting on the Lord, and in wait, in his word, he hopes. Hebrews 11:1 ,Faith is the substance of things hoped for. He is only hoping in his word, I can only imagine how much faith is building as he waits on the Lord alone in a field. It is also the evidence of the things not seen.
There is action in waiting. This makes me think of 2 kinds of waiting. You have a waiting room, where you wait and do nothing. You are just waiting for someone to do something as you sit and look at the time. But then you have a waiter. Continue reading →
The things I am going through right now. I finally get over my husband, and he talks to me about working it out. Who does that? I had to accept that he had just moved on, didn’t want me any more, and was better off without me. No lie I prayed that he wasnt having a great time without me, one of those, reap what you sow, kind of situations. While I was still wishing the best for him and praying for his heart for our daughter. For 2 years I have felt like the Israelites in Judges 10:8. Vexed an opressed, shattered and crushed. Not just broken, but shattered into thousands of pieces. My entire marriage was like this. While he was out doing him, I was at home with the children as depression sets in, trying to take care of home, going to work, making things happen for them, not being a team, and not taking care of me. I waiver liie the waves in the ocean in my relationship with Christ. And this morning, it hit me, Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. I know this already, I have written about it, I have tried to make him see it, but I left pieces of my armor at home.
I think the hardest part about going through all that I am going through is that I am used to being married. It’s kind of crazy because at the same time, I am used to sleeping alone for so long, maybe 5 months now? I know that Valentine’s day is coming up, and that honestly is the scariest day of the year for me. I can really only remember ONE good Valentines day. The rest have been thoughtless, telling me here’s $20 go get you some flowers and candy, starting a fight because they do not like the holiday, and it’s not like going out is a big deal for me on that day. Everywhere you go, the food is more expensive, its crowded, but then again, I do like getting dressed up, so there’s that lol. Perfect excuse to look good!!! ANYWAY, let me get back on topic or, get to the point. I am not sure if it is actually him I miss, or the touch of a man’s hand in the small of my back while my head is on his chest listening to his heart beat, or if it’s the companionship, or if it is him. Just him.